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TEASER
OPEN ON:
CURTAINS RISING.
A centuries old town. Actors gather to sing.
It’s the musical ‘Sweeney Todd: Demon of Barber Street.’
A voice calls out from within the crowd:
DEAN WINCHESTER (O.S.)
Boring!
Everyone looks in the direction of DEAN WINCHESTER, in his early thirties, and carrying a sense of manliness.
DEAN
What? It’s the truth.
Sitting next to him is SAM WINCHESTER, in his late twenties, he seems to be enjoying the play.
DEAN
You kidding me?
SAM
It could be a lead. Everyone attached to this play dies an ominous death.
DEAN
Of boredom. Seriously. Musicals?
Sam shrugs it off. Dean reclines as he begins to doze off. Everything blurs together then into total blackness.
INT. IMPALA - NIGHT
Dean wakes startled in the Impala. He’s in the driver’s seat. Sam sits beside him. Dean laughs, it was a dream. He unconsciously sings:
DEAN
WHERE HAS THE TIME GONE?
WHERE HAVE I BEEN?
FOR ALL THIS TIME?
Dean stops, he wraps his hands around his mouth to stop. Sam ganders over at him taken aback.
SAM
BROTHER DEAN.
ARE YOU LOSING YOUR MIND?
They get out of the IMPALA to see an OLD MOTEL.
DEAN
LOSING MY MIND?
I TAKE ONE LITTLE STEP.
AND IT FEELS LIKE.
I’M LOST.
IN THE SANDS OF TIME!
SAM
WELL TELL ME.
MY BROTHER.
WHAT WAS THE LAST THING.
THAT YOU SAW.
DEAN
WE WERE TRAPPED IN SOME THEATER.
LISTENING TO A FAGGOTY ASS SONG.
SAM
WELL SURELY.
IT MUST HAVE BEEN A DREAM.
BECAUSE NEVER DID THAT HAPPEN.
AND YOU SURE DO LIKE TO SING.
THIS SONG.
DEAN
SAMMY, PLEASE PLEASE LISTEN.
TO A SINGLE WORD I’M SAYING.
I’VE BEEN TRANSPORTED TO THIS.
STRANGE STRANGE MUSICAL LAND.
SAM
A MUSICAL LAND?
DEAN
ONE THAT MAKES US SING.
SAM
THAT’S JUST HOW WE BE.
DEAN
PLEASE GOD HELP ME.
I’M LOST IN A DREAM.
Dean and Sam stroll into the motel.
INT. TUNE-UP MOTEL - MAIN DESK - CONTINUOUS
Dean signals an elderly male RECEPTIONIST wearing a striped black and white suit.
DEAN
A room.
(Realizes)
Thank god.
RECEPTIONIST
WILL THAT BE CASH?
OR CREDIT CA-ARDS!
The receptionist checks them in. Dean hangs his head.
END OF TEASER
ROCK OF AGES:
A VERY SUPERNATURAL MUSICAL!
ACT ONE
INT. TUNE-UP MOTEL - ROOM - MOMENTS LATER
Dean leaps back on the bed. Sam sets his things down.
DEAN
SO, IF I CAN’T CONVINCE YOU.
HOW ELSE CAN I MAKE YOU SEE?
SAM
DEAN, I’M AFRAID.
YOU’RE CLOSE.
TO RUNNING UP.
THE BANANA TREE.
Dean realizes. He bolts up and scavenges for the newspaper.
DEAN
THE CASE!
THE CASE!
THAT OUGHTA MAKE YOU SEE.
THE CASE!
THE CASE!
LAID OUT FOR YOU TO SEE.
Dean slams the paper down in front of Sam. The main headline reads: MUSICAL THEATER PERFORMERS KILLED BY THE INVISIBLE MAN. Sam is astounded.
SAM
IT SEEMS LIKE.
WE ARE DEALING WITH.
A KILLER WHO LIKES TO SING!
DEAN
THIS IS ALL PART.
OF HIS TWISTED REALITY.
SAM
(Realizing)
ALL PART OF HIS.
DEAN
TWISTED REALITY.
Dean automatically does a end song pose. He stops, embarrassed.
DEAN
What the hell was that?
Dean ganders over at Sam who is still dancing.
FLASH CUT TO:
INT. THEATER BACK STAGE - NIGHT
An ATTRACTIVE GUY in his twenties sings with an ATTRACTIVE GIRL in her twenties. Alone. In the dark.
GUY
SWEET SWEET ANGEL.
YOU WILL SEE.
WHEN THOSE LIGHTS GO UP.
THEY WILL SEE.
THE MOST BEAUTIFUL GIRL.
FROM TENNESSEE.
GIRL
I’VE WANTED TO BE A STAR.
UP THERE WALKING.
ON THE BOULEVARD.
GUY
I’M SURE.
YOU WILL MAKE THEM SCREAM.
YOU’RE THE GIRL OF OUR DREAMS.
GIRL
GIRL OF YOUR DREAMS.
GUY
GIRL OF MY DREAMS.
GIRL
BUT YOU’VE HEARD THEM ALL SAY.
THERE’S BEEN DEATH.
STALKING US.
GUY
PROBABLY AT MINIMUM WAGE.
GIRL
THIS ISN’T FUNNY.
Guy wraps his arms around her protectively.
GUY
IT’S ALL OVER NOW.
YOU’RE SAFE FROM ANY HARM.
THEY’LL ALL WELCOME YOU.
WITH OPEN ARMS.
YOU WILL BE THE GIRL.
TO KNOCK THEM DEAD.
GIRL
I WILL BE THE GIRL.
TO KNOCK THEM DEAD.
GUY
YES.
YOU WILL BE THE GIRL.
TO KNOCK THEM DEAD.
They kiss, the guy leaves. The girl dances alone.
GIRL
ALL MY LIFE I’VE WAITED.
I’VE DREAMED OF THIS NIGHT.
SEEING ALL THEIR CAMERAS.
STANDING IN THE SPOT LIGHT.
IT ALMOST WASN’T ME.
THERE WAS ANOTHER GIRL.
WHO BLEW UP HER KNEE.
BLOODY AND TRUE IT WAS.
AND THANK HEAVENS.
CAUSE NOW I’M NUMBER ONE.
MAN’S VOICE
I AM THE VOICE THAT GUIDES YOU.
I AM THE VOICE OF THE NIGHT.
I AM THE VOICE THAT CHANNELS.
THAT VERY SPOT LIGHT.
The girl stops, she looks around, growing afraid.
GIRL
WHO ARE YOU?
STRANGER IN THE DARK.
MAN’S VOICE
I AM THE SPIRIT.
WHO IS AFTER.
YOUR HEART.
GIRL
I’VE ALREADY GOT.
A BOYFRIEND.
FOR AFTER DARK.
MAN’S VOICE
IS THAT YOUR LAST REHEARSAL?
IS THAT YOUR FINAL VERSE?
GIRL
YOU CAN GO TO HELL.
YOU BIG OLD CREEPY JERK.
MAN’S VOICE
SEE YOU THERE FIRST.
A SCAFFOLDING falls from above. The Girl screams. It slams right down on her. Blood scatters everywhere. The girl’s head rolls to overlook the stage.
The lights dim as a dark translucent shadow man wearing a top hat and black cape passes in and out.
EXT. NEW YORK CITY - TIMES SQUARE - DAY
Dean leaps out of the Impala to see thousands of people passing around going nowhere fast. Sam gets out. They’re dressed in suits and ties. Cops are nearby.
SAM
HOT TOWN.
SUMMER IN THE CITY.
BACK OF MY NECK.
GETTING DIRTY AND GRITTY.
BEEN DOWN.
ISN’T IT A PITY.
DOESN’T SEEM.
TO BE A SHADOW IN THE CITY.
DEAN
ALL AROUND.
PEOPLE LOOKING HALF DEAD.
WALKING ON THE SIDEWALK.
HOTTER THAN A MATCH HEAD.
Everyone, including the cops, start to gather around.
CITY CIVILIANS
BUT AT NIGHT.
IT’S A DIFFERENT WORLD.
GO OUT AND FIND A GIRL.
Two girls swarm around Dean, he grins loving the action.
CITY CIVILIANS
COME-ON COME-ON.
AND DANCE ALL NIGHT.
DESPITE THE HEAT.
IT’LL BE ALRIGHT.
Dean dances with the civilians through the streets and over cars. Sam remains steadfast and professional.
DEAN
AND BABE.
DON’T YOU KNOW IT’S A PITY.
THAT THE DAYS CAN’T BE LIKE.
THE NIGHTS.
DEAN & CITY CIVILIANS
IN THE SUMMER, IN THE CITY.
IN THE SUMMER, IN THE CITY.
Dean pulls one of the girls in.
DEAN
COOL TOWN.
EVENING IN THE CITY.
DRESSING SO FINE.
AND LOOKING SO PRETTY.
SAM
COOL CAT.
LOOKING FOR A KITTY.
GONNA LOOK IN EVERY CORNER.
OF THE CITY.
Dean kisses both girls then swings them away.
DEAN
TILL I’M WHEEZING LIKE A BUS STOP.
RUNNING UP THE STAIRS.
GONNA MEET YOU ON THE ROOFTOP.
EXT. TIMES SQUARE ROOFTOPS - MOMENTS LATER
Dean and Sam dance with the whole city in swing. Among them are various actors in musical costumes.
ENSEMBLE
BUT AT NIGHT.
IT’S A DIFFERENT WORLD.
GO OUT AND FIND A GIRL.
COME-ON COME-ON.
AND DANCE ALL NIGHT.
DESPITE THE HEAT.
IT’LL BE ALRIGHT.
DEAN
AND BABE.
SAM
DON’T YOU KNOW IT’S A PITY.
DANCING GIRLS sway around them.
DEAN & SAM
THAT THE DAYS CAN’T BE LIKE.
THE NIGHTS.
DANCING GIRLS
IN THE SUMMER, IN THE CITY.
IN THE SUMMER, IN THE CITY.
Everyone does a pose. Dean and Sam are out of breath. Everyone heaves over. Dean and Sam leap down to two cops.
DEAN
My name is Elfman, his name’s Webber. We’re with the FBI.
Dean and Sam flash their badges. The cops lead them away.
INT. MUSICAL THEATER - DAY
A MANAGER (60s) guides Dean and Sam through a historic theater. The age shows in every nook and cranny. Actors rehearse on stage.
MANAGER
THEY ALL COME OUT HERE.
WITH A DREAM.
TO SING THEIR HEARTS OUT.
A’ LA-DIDDLE-DEE.
OUT OF NOWHERE IT COMES.
NOW EVERYONE IS SCARED.
OF WILL WE MAKE IT OUT ALIVE?
DEAN
SOUNDS LIKE THE GHOST.
OF JULIE TAYMORE.
MADE IT OUT OF.
HER NINE-TO-FIVE.
Sam shoots Dean a look, he shrugs it off.
MANAGER
ALL THESE KIDS I KNOW THEM.
THEY COME OUT HERE WITH A DREAM.
NOW THAT DREAM IS VANISHING.
GETTING LOST IN A MAZE.
SAM
WE WILL FIND A WAY.
TO MAKE IT RIGHT.
WE WILL FIND A WAY.
TO SET THINGS RIGHT.
MANAGER
OH GOD I HOPE SO.
CAUSE NOW THAT DREAM.
IS A NIGHTMARE.
OF CATASTROPHIC.
PROPORTIONALITY!
The lights dim. Flashing lights rock around. Dean and Sam scan the area to see the actors dancing towards them snapping their fingers to the electric guitar riff.
MANAGER
IT’S BECOMING A NIGHTMARE!
BLOOD HERE, BLOOD THERE!
BLOOD EVERY FREAKING WHERE!
LITTLE SUZIE.
I KNEW HER WELL.
WANTED TO BREAK OUT.
BE A DIVA SWELL.
SHE GOT HER LIMBS CHOPPED OFF.
BY THE PHANTOM SPELL.
JAKE MY BOY.
WAS A STAR.
ON A WAR PATH HE WAS.
UNTIL THE PHANTOM THREW HIM OFF.
AND HE FELL.
CHRISTIE.
ANGEL.
HER MOUTH GOT STAPLED.
BY THAT PHANTOM SWINE.
DAVIE.
THAT GAY FROM THE BRONX.
DANCED UNTIL HIS FEET CAVED IN.
AND HIS ANKLES... THEIR... WELL...
NOW THIS NIGHTMARE!
CONTINUES ON AND ON AND ON!
WE HAVE TO FIND THAT PHANTOM!
ACTORS
ON AND ON AND ON!
MANAGER
WE HAVE TO MAKE HIM PAY!
ACTORS
ON AND ON AND ON!
MANAGER
BECAUSE OUR DEAR SHOW.
ACTORS
ON AND ON AND ON!
MANAGER
CAN NOT BE DELAYED.
ACTORS
ON AND ON AND ON!
ACTORS & MANAGER
ANOTHER DAY!
Everyone does a final pose. The lights come back on. Everyone resumes what they were doing last.
DEAN
We’ll see what we can do.
SAM
You called this guy ‘the phantom’?
MANAGER
Legend’s been around for years.
DEAN
As in Phantom of the Opera?
MANAGER
Every idea comes from somewhere.
Dean and Sam exchange startled looks.
BLACK OUT!
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Sn Musical: Rock Of Ages, From the creator of 'Multus Tempestas'
